Kim Jong Boris orders immediate propaganda

So in recent days it has been reported that orders have come down from the supreme leader, Kim Jong Boris to commence an immediate wave of propaganda. It has been announced that effective immediately, UK diplomats are to refer to the UK as “one country” rather than “four nations of the UK” under new plans to “strengthen the union” (whitewash three of the four nations).

Whitehall officials are also being told to “stop ignoring the Union and put its preservation at the heart of policymaking”.

Plans for a university student exchange scheme within the UK have also been discussed. Not that students will have much of a choice since Boris ripped the UK out of the EU, and denied university students access to erasmus.

The revelations were made alongside plans for the Duke and Duchess of Cambridge to spend more time in Scotland, (which is exactly what the people of Scotland want to see, rich people with special privilege lecturing ordinary scots on how we’re “all in it together).

A YouGov poll in Scotland found that more people favour Prince William, with 69% of voters holding a positive view of him, over just 22% of Scots with a favourable view of Boris Johnson, so we can see Boris’s thought process here. But the poll was only a comparison of the two, which is kind of like asking whether you’d prefer COVID 19 or the Spanish Flu.

Another thing that Boris seems keen to role out is the mandatory singing of a song each day by School children called “one country, one people”. The racist connotations there are a bit too ironic.

So in summation, it’s back to the old Westminster adage of not actually fixing anything, just branding it with a union jack and hoping nobody notices it’s on its last legs. The diplomats being asked to incorrectly describe the UK as a country, when it isn’t, because its an economic and political union – which any 1st year high school student studying modern studies will tell you. This, of course, completely trying to erase the fact that there are four culturally unique countries in the UK. It almost reminds you of the attempted eradication of certain Scottish Languages.

Whitehall is being told to “put the preservation of the union at the heart of policymaking” which is a codeword for “whitewash the nations that are not England” out of existence. Students are to be offered what I will colloquially term “shitty Erasmus”, and we’re going to get a stack of royals lecturing us about how great it all is. Oh! and kids being forced to sing a unionist song every morning like the children of North Korea!

Give me a choice between this and a root canal, i’ll take the root canal.

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